Disclaimer: this post contains admittedly excessive use of [expletive serving as a verb. Or adjective. Possibly a noun or adverb as well.] Continue at your own risk. Also, this post is very fucking long. Hush.
I feel like this post should be a little organized. I actually sat and did research about it. Proof of aforementioned research may appear as me pontificating, by the way. I'm not sorry.
But knowing me and my scatterbrain, that's about as likely to happen as it is that I'll have a million dollars by tomorrow. As I've said before somewhere on here, if you know me personally, read this in my actual voice and that should make it somewhat easier.
Anyway, today I'm gonna step out of my comfort zone a little and talk about the pros and cons of casual sex. Someone's been going into some of my followers' curiouscats and asking them something along the lines of that, and I was intrigued.
No one asks me questions on mine, because I am a Twitter wallflower. Art imitating life, in a way.
So yeah. The dictionary defines "casual sex" as:
sexual activity between people who are not established sexual partners or do not know each other well.
Stuff like you fucking some of your followers (no shade. I've done it), or that guy/girl you met at a party and the light hit them just right, or that one night stand you had with someone you don't particularly like. I could go on, but I feel like I'll end up stepping on more toes than I've planned.
Anyhoodles, I admit I kinda conflated it with friends with benefits. And now I'm tempted to do a post about the pros and cons of that. Eventually.
(Will you stop yapping and get on to the actual post, sis?)
Like almost everything in life, that "likkle one fuck" has advantages and disadvantages. Which is the entire fucking point of this post. I'll just get to it.
Why you should engage inna di likkle one fuck
It's fun.
Yes, sex is fun. When it's done right. Between two consenting and capable adults, a di nicest ting. (YES, CAPABLE. YOU HAVE SOME PEOPLE PON DIS EARTH WEH CYA FUCK.)
You'll learn a thing or two.
Lol sometimes people are willing to push various boundaries with relative strangers. Something along the lines of "well mi nah see dem again, suh nutn nuh wrong if mi do suh." I would not know, though. I'm as virginal as the baby weh born last night.
It saves time. (Yes, it does.)
You're horny, the other person is horny. Somebody sends out the booty call, and two twos unnu a fuck. No time wasted going round a bag a corners and lyricizing and such. Get in, get off, get out. Slam, bam, thank you *insert gender-appropriate honorific*
Less expectations. (Kinda.)
Remember the definition of casual sex? Good. Why try jumping through hoops for somebody you'll likely never see or hear from again? (Not that you shouldn't at least try to make it good for them, but, I mean...come on.)
Hello? At least you're fucking. Better off than nuff.
Self-explanatory. Besides, sex is good for you. It's stress relief, you're getting exercise, and orgasms are always great. Those, by the way, strengthen your immune system and increase levels of sex hormones so your hair and skin and such look better. (I'd cite, but this isn't something I'm doing for school, so unnu lucky.)
Why you should not engage inna di likkle one fuck
STDs. Pregnancy. Other nasty stuff. Nyack.
I have to go there, guys, and you know it. Let's be honest, how many people would stop right before they enter the gates of heaven -- wink, wink -- and say "hey, xyz." How many people would even remember to ask? You can't tell somebody's walking around with the sexual equivalent of a fully loaded gun just by looking. And let's not even talk about getting knocked up. Pregnancy in general is nasty. Impregnating/being impregnated by a relative stranger must be torture. (Imagine getting the clap and the knock up? Fuck)
The Walk of Shame (if you've slept over)
By the way, friends, that's a rookie mistake. As yuh come, please to go. The walk of shame isn't fun. You're wearing your clothes from last night, you probably smell like fuck (and probably just smell), and based on my time at UWI somebody has more than likely heard you and called a crowd to come listen in. That's hella embarrassing.
Feelings.
Lmao I consider feelings kind of an emotional STD that's very difficult to cure. (Syphilis? Gonorrhea? I read that there's a strain that's incurable now.) Imagine: you and this person a fuck and all of a sudden somebody a ketch feelings. Hello??? Nah. Feelings make things messy. 0/10, definitely would not recommend.
Should you engage inna di likkle one fuck?
Lmao bredda do weh you wah do. I'm not here to police anybody and their genitals. Just be safe, zimme.
Later.
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